This will probably be the last post about my counsellor

[frightened]

And when I'm done rolling on the floor laughing, I'll probably be offended and upset and whatnot. But for now, I'm Lorna the ROFLator.

So, today I discovered that my counsellor, the person I go to to try and come to terms with the chronic mental illness that might kill me, has a problem with mental illness. Actually, I'd say my soon-to-be-ex-counsellor is part of the problem with mental illness.

I'd been suspecting that his view of depression and mine were not the same, given his use of weasel words like "problem" and "issues", and his obvious discomfort when I used words like "crazy" and "brain disease". Today I managed to get his view out of him, with a bit of poking and acting more innocent and ignorant than I in fact was.

Apparently I am not crazy, because I'm not *strange wobbly arms-and-torso gesture*. (He has in the past said that I don't "act crazy", which makes me worry, if the people in his life stare at the floor and cry uncontrollably and that's somehow normal.)

I claimed ignorance.

He explained that crazy is schizophrenia, which is serious.

I pointed out that someone with depression is more likely to kill themselves than someone with schizophrenia.*

He said - wait for it, because this is a good one - that schizophrenics kill other people.

I was briefly stunned into silence. Then I said, "Please tell me you don't actually believe that." With further prodding, I established that he thinks attacks by schizophrenics** are more common than, say, domestic violence.

He also expressed astonishment that I would, in calling myself "crazy", be prepared to be associated with Those People. And said that crazy is a derogatory term, before going on to explain to me how schizophrenics really were crazy.

Did I mention this guy is a counsellor? Because this guy is A FRIGGING COUNSELLOR. I don't even know, you guys. Maybe I should just post him a bunch of Mind leaflets on the subject of stigma and danger and whatnot, and stay the fuck away from him for evermore. (I did try to interject with some tiresome 'factual information', but I don't think it made a dent.)

* I think it's worth saying that generally, I don't think "A is worse off than B" is a useful road to go down. He has pursued that in the past, and got responses varying from "well, good for them, and I'm sure they're a very noble inspiration" to "yeah, and 24,000 people starve to death every day, and we should be worrying about that instead of sitting here discussing my feelings like middle-class whiners." I know I'm not the craziest or the worst-off, mmkay? It doesn't help.

** Goddamn it, six years of training my violence to expert*** levels, and I've gone and ruined it by picking the wrong mental illness. How am I supposed to kick someone's brain out the back of their head now?

*** Not really. I mean, I really did three years of Kyokushinkai and three years of Shotokan karate. But that makes me far, far from an expert.

Comments

[meatina]

*blinks*
I was preparing to on my LOLerskates and head towards the ROFLcopter, then I read behind the cut.

I agree with you- A vs B is not good. I know I'm not depressed as others. That causes it's own issues.

As for the comments about Schizophrenia- that is so appalling I have no words. A good friend of mine at college (who sadly I don't have contact with anymore) was diagnosed with it in the time I knew him, and far from being worried that he'd hurt me, I was worried that he'd end up dead himself.

Any bodies you can report him to? Ignorance is not bliss in this case.

[frightened]

Fun fact: talking therapies in Britain are almost completely unregulated. There are a few competing professional bodies, all of which are self-policing and entirely optional.

Ah well. You get what you pay for, and this guy was free.

[meatina]

That's a very odd definition of fun...
I agree with your icon. That does suck. I've had mixed experiences with them (CBT did not work), and given it's what doctors want to try first (especially as some "don't believe in pills"- a direct quote from an ex-doctor), that really shouldn't be the case.

[gavagai]

...wow. I was going to snark, but I am just being genuinely appalled that this guy a) chose to work with crazy folk and b) is allowed to.

[frightened]

I guess, from his view, he's not working with crazy folk. He's working with folk who *hushed voice* have issues, and the crazy folk are over there, being crazy, nothing to do with us.

[couchemal]

MY GOD, I bet you're right, and my mouth literally fell open when I read the schizophrenic thing. Is it wrong of me to hope that one day he gets killed by a completely sane person? Just for irony purposes.

I'm sorry you have to talk to him for any reason, let alone when he's trying to "help" you.

[frightened]

He's also said to be me before that he doesn't think bulimia's crazy. And I said, "You don't?! Because I think it's fucking crazy."

Come to think of it, his definition of crazy has never had much to do with how maddening the actual crazy person finds it.

[couchemal]

If you have the spoons, please bedevil this man with statistics, charts, and graphs. Or just bedevil him in general because he deserves it.

My GOD HOW and WHY is he working in the mental health field. Is there money in it? Is that his motivation, do you think? Whatever it is, he's making the world a shittier place.

[tree]

i initially read this before work. at the time i hoped that a day of drudgery would allow me to come up with a response other than the one i had at the time. that hasn't happened. all i'm left is, just, what? does he even exist in the same reality we do?