Must... stay... strong...

The cat's giving me huge mournful eyes because I won't let her go out, what with bonfire night and Divali. Fireworks and pets are a bad combination at the best of times, and I live in an area where there's been a few RSPCA prosecutions.

Thing is, my parents' cats can go out during the day, because they always come running when you call them in. But Millie doesn't respond to being called at all, and she has a past history of disappearing for days (and on one memorable occasion, months) on end. Sorry, kitty. You're gonna have to be a housecat for a couple of weeks.

Things I neither like nor understand

"T-shirt bras"

I thought the purpose was to have a bra you could wear under a clingy t-shirt and not have seams or lumps. Apparently not. As far as I can tell, the purpose is to have a bra you can wear under a very baggy t-shirt, and still have your breasts look cartoonishly large and pointy.

And what the hell is with all this padding? I'm a D-cup! They don't need to be any bigger! They don't need pushing up and out of the damn cups! They just need to stay in one place while I run for the bus.

Also, when I buy underwear, I find myself pitching my voice higher and softer to save us all the confusion and embarrassment.