>>But the leaves are so short and fat! Ditto mint. These leaves were longer and thinner and more dramatically serrated. And, you know, arranged differently. <<

Obvious differences to you and me, but we're plant people. I can tell a car from a truck, but looking at a car I mostly just peg its color. Other folks can tell model and year at a glance based on details. It depends on what you've filled your database with. Mine is mostly live things.

>>I hope the bindweed and horsetail and brambles and twitch that infest my allotment follow them home <<

I hope so too. Even weeds need a home!